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Become happy why not?

An attempt to live happy, really happy not just OK

Saturday, November 25

Does Mona Lisa want to get married?


Mona Lisa Smile

The title attracted my attention as my brother used to tell me I have Mona Lisa smile,
I am watching the movie as I am writing the post,
it drove me to think, what am I doing with my life, am I living it, or just watching it go by,
what do I want,
what do I need,
who am I,
seems important questions yet are too silly when I listen to them,

Am I a girl, or a 27 years-old girl, or a graduate student, or an Egyptian, or ........ What?
I know I am all of the above, but is that my "definition",

what is more important to me, to have my PhD and bright career and my dream of being such a successful scientist, is that it?
or as one of the characters in the movie said that being a house wife can be your choice, you don't have to be dumb to be a house wife,
or is it as my mentor told me, don't get married now, you don't need it, really I don't?

So is it a choice a girl has to make, either marriage and family or a bright career,

many might say: why a choice you can have both,

who are you fooling, are you kidding yourself, no one has both,
I am not saying a job, I am not talking about having a career,
I am talking about a "bright" career,

I remember I was once told by a guy, I am too ambitious to settle down and get married,

All of this just made me want to decide once and for all, do I want to get into a relationship and compromise my "bright" career, and settle for a just a job,

do I live for my work, or do I work for living, (sort of do we eat to live, or live to eat analog)

The last 10 years of my life, I have lived to work, study and learn,
I had fun, don't get me wrong, my life wasn't anywhere near dull or boring,

but I had no plans other than being the top of my class for 5 consecutive years of my college study, then excelling in exams to get accepted in USA universities, then proving myself in USA with their tough courses , and finally coping with the lab work and excelling in what I do.

When I was 9 years old, and in a girls talk, I said, I will never leave my child once I have him/her, I will quit working and take care of my family,
years later when I was 15 years old, I was away with my dad, and it was summer and I was the "house lady" (my mum was away) I used to wait for my dad for hours he'd call and say he's on his way home, but comes so late, that I keep on re heating dinner, several times. That day I decided, I will certainly work and have a career of my own , I can't wait for some guy reheating food even if I love him, it would be too much of a sacrifice.

Now at the age of 27, I wonder which girl was right, and I wonder if I will ever have time and energy to get married,

to be continued...

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